This week on SHLTMM, my guest, classically trained singer and teacher, Christen Horne, shares stories of her mother Karla who grew up in southern California. Christen would like SHLTMM listeners to know that she loves her mother very much and is grateful for "all that my mom taught me, intentionally and unintentionally," and because of her mom, Christen was able to move through her mental health journey.
Christen Horne refers to herself as a nerd, geek and gamer. She's a big fan of reading and loves Star Wars.
As an accomplished singer, she received her Masters in Opera Performance. In addition to the entire family being singers and musicians, archery became a big part of their lives as well. When Karla, Christen's mother, was in high school she became the California State Champion Archer and the family still enjoys the sport today.
Having a mom that worked wasn't that unusual for Christen. Her mom had been a paralegal for years after completing her associates degree. As the three children were growing up, Karla was leading worship at the local church. They spent a lot of time at the church. But my guest says she enjoyed it because they were always singing.
Ms. Horne fondly remembers her mom embracing whatever fun activities the kids would be involved in, including going to water parks and going down the water slides together, playing board games and spending quality time involved with the family. Years ago, Christen was actively involved in her community theatre programs. She fondly retells the story of the production of "Fiddler On The Roof," when her mom and aunt were "volun-told' that they had to play village fathers. There were no other boys/male actors to play the part. They still laugh about it today.
Christen considered her mother as being firm yet compassionate when it came to disciplining the three kids. Homework definitely took the priority especially over video games. Homework wasn't done, no one got to play. Christen says "mom was always really good about helping us find the balance in things. Making sure we had time to play and making sure we got our homework done."
It wasn't until Christen started to realize that she often hid her emotions, that she started to recall other instances from her childhood that were clearly unhappy. She had suffered from depression at a young age that was left undiagnosed. She felt that her mother was embarrassed when Christen showed her true emotions. Horne shared with me that "through my mental health journey, I've gotten more comfortable being more myself around my mom." Often feeling "this is my fault," Christen often blamed herself and felt that if her mother rejected her, it would be devastating. It's scary to be a young child and not understand complicated emotional situation.
Working with coaches on a regular basis has helped Christen tremendously. "You pick one hurt, then move on to another," reflects Horne. Through working with her coaches she says her relationship with her mom is so much better and she's very grateful for all the support.
Christen is now working on her fantasy book which features her main character 'Alkara' who's named after mother and who also is an archer. Here is the link. https://worldofurda.com/
Christen Horne https://lajollamusic.com/christen-horne-voice
https://hornestudio.lpages.co/
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